Philomena Totilo

Obituary of Philomena R. Totilo

Philomena Rose Totilo, 87, of Stamford, CT., died peacefully on Saturday, December 14th, after a decline from a long-term illness. Philomena was born July 19, 1932 in Stamford, CT. and graduated from Stamford High School in 1950. Following high school, Philomena was a long-time employee of Cummings & Lockwood law firm, where she worked for many of the founding partners as a para-legal secretary in estates and trusts. As a young woman, Philomena enjoyed singing in a Stamford chorale group, where she met and fell in love with her best friend, Anthony (Tony) Totilo. They married November 24th, 1956 and shared 63 years of marriage that modeled a loving companionship and deep devotion to their family of four children and five grandsons. Always an active person, Philomena enjoyed tennis, reading, solving crossword puzzles, and playing Rummikube. During the course of her life, she served as a member of St. Gabriel’s Church, both as a reader at daily Mass and as participant in a variety of Catholic Charities events that included preparing her homemade baked ziti for the Stamford Soup Kitchen. Philomena will be long remembered for her love of entertaining both family and friends. As an expression of her love, she took time to thoughtfully collect and try new recipes, as well as prepare favorite Italian family dishes and traditional holiday meals. She honored the specific tastes of each of her children and grandchildren on their birthdays, and has left a legacy of the importance of making time to connect around the dinner table. Philomena is survived by her beloved and devoted husband, Anthony (Tony) Totilo (Stamford), three sons, and one daughter; Kenneth Totilo (Brooklyn, NY); Richard Totilo & his wife, Toni (Highland Village, TX); Peter Totilo & his wife, Michelle (Sterling, MA); and Susan Totilo-Smith & her husband, David Smith (Monroe, CT.). She is also survived by five grandsons: Max Totilo & his wife, Alida (Brooklyn, NY); Jake Totilo (New Paltz, NY); Daniel Totilo (London, UK); Anthony Totilo (Dallas, TX); and Alex Totilo (San Marcos, TX). Philomena was a devoted sister to her three younger siblings; her brother, Thomas Russo & his wife Wendy (Mattapoisett, MA.); her brother, Francis Russo (who pre-deceased her) and sister-in-law, Maureen (Russo) Hartzog (Jupiter, FL); and her sister, Marie Giannitti & husband Joseph Giannitti (who both pre-deceased her). A Mass of Christian burial will be held at Friday, December 20th, 11:00 a.m. at St. Gabriel’s Church, 914 Newfield Ave. Stamford, CT. Following the mass, a funeral procession will commence for interment at St. John’s Catholic Cemetery, 25 Camp Ave. Darien, CT. Following interment, Philomena’s husband and children will receive family members and friends at a luncheon meal, venue to be announced. In lieu of flowers, the family requests memorial donations be made to Catholic Charities, 238 Jewett Ave., Bridgeport, CT., to honor Philomena’s years of dedication to serving others. Donation information can be found at their website,
To send flowers to the family of Philomena Totilo, please visit Tribute Store

Mass of Christian Burial

11:00 am
Friday, December 20, 2019
St. Gabriel Church
914 Newfield Avenue
Stamford, Connecticut, United States


St. John's Cemetery
Camp Ave
Darien, Connecticut, United States
Share Your Memory of